My fate of hell had found me

As my mind turned black

I knew in my soul 

This was my own spiritual attack 

Death wrote me he was coming soon

Said he heard it’s what I craved 

But was never believed and asked for proof

Since my mask controlled how I behaved

As a chemically numbed workaholic 

I created my own curse

To escape my past

A life path known to be the worst

The world craved death for me

With the exception of my faith

My mind drew up a story

That their ultimate happiness would be my dying day

My body began to shut down

More unwell than my minds thoughts

Since I wasn’t going to do it 

My demon took over as the boss

You used to starve yourself 

So now you can’t eat.

Beauty had been what you desired

So karma is what you’ll meet.

The world will see you glowing 

Your brightness will make them all blind

Unsuspecting envy will drain you

Never to be remembered as someone kind.

I think it was fame you had wanted 

So your exaggerated rumored sins will be front page.

Now you’re known more than ever

Be grateful for your new stage.

I gave you what you wished 

Didn’t say it would last long

Now remember what you told me 

Or maybe you forgot 

You said an end was what you wanted most

So shortly death will greet you 

If you don’t correct what you’ve done wrong

My clock had reached the witching hour 

This devil’s curse disturbed my rest

With God and his heavenly power

He put my faith to His ultimate test

Is it death you wanted

Or peace in your heart and soul?

Forgive yourself like I have

And you’ll have the choice to still grow old.

God how can you forgive me

Look at the destruction that I’ve caused 

I don’t know how this happened

How did my soul become so lost 

I craved the love you always gave

But never received in the flesh

I settled for lust and vanity

Somehow it got enmeshed

Forgive me Lord

I’ll change my ways

I’ll live my life 

Peace is what I crave

Death seemed like the only choice

To rectify my ways

But even if they rejoiced

It would be you who was betrayed

The one who gave me life

And sent messages through my dreams

Help me heal the wounds I’ve caused 

And give everyone some relief 

Peace is what you wish

So I’ll heal your broken heart.

I’ll seal it with a kiss

So you can have your fresh new start.